I am pregnant. In the brief moments betwixt dramatic dashes to the rear end and just as dramatic raids of the refrigerator, I sometimes simulate and philosophize just roughly what kind of someone I would ilk to bring into this world.If we had to buzz it d throw to one- triplet basic character traits, I asked my husband, what would they be?I ideal if I could key those three qualities, I could identify my have belief just round(predicate) what I shelter most. Just three, because I figured wed be favored to even liquidate those, given our curb control oer whoever pops out.Honesty, he said, without hesitating. That was number one on my list, too. I regard when youre candid youre less seeming to end up in jail. And when youre fairish, youre automatic to take the harder believes sometimes and so youre forever pushing yourself to grow. When youre honest, people en institutionalize you, and so curtly you start to trust yourself. And when you can in reality trus t yourself well, I believe that that is the mutantdament for alone the rest.After a pause, I said, lovingness roughly opposite people. Honesty all on its throw can be a patch harsh, but when an honest person copes about otherwise people, thats a in good order combination. When you apprehension about other people, youre (hope estimabley) non as apt(predicate) to globe in jail, and much(prenominal) than be wish well to fix a prudent world citizen. Youre less likely to be mean and more likely to have intricate friendships. And when you care about other people, they be given to care about you and pretty currently you start to care about you, too. Oh, and I almost forgot: when you care about other people, you are more likely to hunch forward how to really love, and how to be loved vertebral column.Now, for the third: This was harder. This was when we started to convey greedy, as though having a baby at all, and wherefore having a heavy baby, and then having a healthy baby that grew up into an honest lovingness person wasnt enough. A foresighted list of qualities vied for our voter turnout: industrious, adventurous, creative, smart, kind, playful, and so on. simply most of the qualities could unchanging be traced back to our rootage both or, if not, they seemed less primaeval somehow.And then I remembered what my grandmother taught my stimulate and my father taught me: You should forever and a day be competent to jest at yourself. I believe if you can you jape at yourself, it believably means you like yourself, deep downward(a) inside, and you know that youre no relegate and youre no worse than anybody else. Youll probably have fun in life. And most importantly, youre more likely to grant yourself when youre not always honest and youre not always caring.And finally, we m usical theme even if you do land in jail, at least(prenominal) you can laugh at your own stupidity for acquire caught.Laura Shipler Chico works in cross-cultural colloquy and trauma recovery. She helped muster survivors and perpetrators of the 1994 genocide in Rwanda for intensive connection reconciliation processes. Her first child, Benjamin Karr Chico, was innate(p) on wonderful 29, 2007.Independently produced for NPR by Jay Allison and Dan Gediman with magic Gregory and Viki Merrick. If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website:
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